Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Only beauty to fill our souls

I have just read a sentimental article about ballet. I just simply love ballet and I  treat it as a therapy for stress relief probably. I learn music and I play piano but I don't think they affect me like how ballet does on me. To me, it is more than dance.

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What Is It About Ballet?

If you ask any one person what it is about ballet that they love so much you will get a million different answers. If the person you are asking is not a dancer themselves then you will hear them mention the beautiful costumes or the haunting music. Those who don’t dance are fascinated with the physical agility of the ballerina.


If you ask a ballet dancer what they love about ballet you will hear them speak of creative expression, discipline, self control, and enjoying the challenge of trying to reach the highest level of perfection in technique.


I have thought long and hard about this ballet thing trying to find the right words to describe just why ballet is adored by so many.


In this world we have a daily dose of negativity surrounding us from television news reports and newspapers. We know this world is full of ugly things; earthquakes, famines, murders, disease, poverty, and abuse.


Then we catch a glimpse of a ballet and suddenly we are transported away from all the negativity into a world of beauty, elegance, and grace. For that hour or two we can live in a joyous world, a creative paradise. No bad news, only beauty to fill our souls.


That is why I call the ballerina an angel. She brings a little piece of heaven down to the weary masses and gives us the gift of hope for a more beautiful world.

--From "Ballet Forever 


Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Just not good enough

Seldom I feel good about myself. I am not born with perfection or conditions that naturally make myself proud. I know I have flaws and there's time I even reject myself.

These days my heart has broken in some way- by disappointment, fear, rejection and ridicule. Everyday I try very hard to shape myself to be the one I desire to be. Everyday I just find I don't really look like myself. I pick up the sword and shield to fight for every challenges in order to keep my balance to move on. I don't even know how many weaknesses and sadness I could still hide underneath my mechanical bitter smile.

My friend always said " Why do you just give others blessings but not yourself?" 
I am a very protective person and it's  hard to break my wall and open my heart to anyone solely because I just feel I am not good enough and I don't want to get hurt again.

Indeed, the insecure feeling kills me.